Oct 19, 2006

What I need is a ballad

For the half-dozenth time in my life, a bird flew over me with advanced physics and aiming techniques, his pooh strategically landing on my party of one. They say this is lucky. I'm inclined to disagree, although feel a pang of dissonance considering I'm not starving or living in a war torn area.

Where I am living, for the next 2 weeks, is in Takoma Park, a suburb I've renamed Takoma Purple due to its many vibrantly painted homes. That, and because of the two grown men walking in bright purple suits. Even the bird doo had a purplish hue. This bastion of 7th Day Adventists has a cute Old Town center that eluded me for my first few days. When I finally hunted her down this afternoon, I sipped her coffee and tried on her vintage coats.

During the sipping portion of the cuteness, I found the most upbeat barista ever.
"Do you mind a little change?" asked the elderly customer. Nicest man ever answered, "We could always use some change, if it'll lighten your load."

Coffeeshops. This one on this day held safely within it a bearded man mumbling to himself and scratching in a notebook about something other than taking a bath. A couple of ladies who lunch giggled over tofurkey sammies, and the obligatory handsome man in dark-rimmed glasses spread out his important papers and typed furiously on his laptop. Between calls.

The ladies who lunch got dessert and continued their conversation. The thin lunchlady said, "You've politely listened to me and I've waited for you to bring it up but you haven't. Last time we spoke you were in quite a quandary, so spill it."

"Oh, I'm ok. I'm fine. Really, it's getting better."

"Don't give me the brush-off. You know that's not gonna work. Is this why you haven't returned my phone calls, because you knew I would ask?"

"Just let me get some chocolate in me first," chubbier lunchlady proffered. "It's getting better," she restated and then went on to talk about a furniture division before declaring, "What I need is a ballad."

Don't we all?

Thin lunchlady then shifted focus. "Do you want to go shopping?"

"No, I want a new body."

"Oh. I can't help you with that. Actually, I could. My horse was just diagnosed as obese."

Chubby woman spoke a total of 1 minute and 15 seconds before this zinger rendered her listener once more and order was restored.

YouTube will grant your every wish, chubby lunchlady. They've got so many ballads you can make your own. Here, why not start with Up Where We Belong by electric organ dude:

1 comment:

Delilah said...

Sorry about the bird poop again! Sounds like Takoma Purple is just a taste of Americana. Great observations.