Jul 30, 2006

Senator Stevens, I found your tubes in West Virginia and They're Charging for the Water!


Water is a valuable substance but its exact price varies from situation to situation. Consider the amounts I paid for it yesterday (in order of least to most expensive) in the great state of West Virginia:

1. $0.01
This is for the opportunity to drink a small glass with a lemon wedge at the Armory Pub in Harper's Ferry, WV.

Customs be damned, the Armory Pub is a pioneer who's not afraid to monetize a glass of tap water. And why not? The water is a part of restaurant overhead and by God the lemon wedge costs money too! I know it's hard out there for a pub, but if you're gonna spend at least a cent's worth of ink to charge for it, you should probably place the price point a bit higher. The check does have a beautiful sort of symmetry though, no?


2. $1.06
This is for the opportunity to drink Coca Cola's Dasani water in a clear, plastic, bottle. More expensive than gasoline.


3. $25
This is for the opportunity to ride the Potomac River in a tube. It includes a lifejacket, a yard of twine, innertube, a dropoff and pickup bus ride, and endless amounts of fun. Mother Nature's great and sticky invention, H2O, is the glue that holds these ingredients together. Without it, Butts Tubes Inc would have a hard time making me part with twenty-five bones.

(Photo by Meg and Rahul)

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